Full Circle Series-Day 3: "Groups N' Stuff"

I can’t really divulge much from group sessions due to privacy agreements.  However, nothing is ever said so I’m not really withholding anything.  I must comment on the fact that I am entirely uncomfortable talking in front of people.  I always think people are looking at me with a perception that I am lying. 

However, how would I know if they are looking at me or judging me?  I always have my eyes down or up at the ceiling, you know, anything to avoid eye contact while I’m talking. 

People Observations:

• Senor Poopy Pants has established himself as the guy who asks the same question over and over and still can’t understand the answer given to him. 

• John Goodman’s laid back attitude and dead pan delivery are quite amusing. 

• Mr. Pigeon, my roommate, is a conspiracy theorist all of a sudden.  He thinks everybody is out to get him and everything about the institution we are staying at is a scam.  He gets quite heated about everything, but what makes it funny is that even when he raises his voice he still talks with the Minnesota accent so it is really hard not to laugh.  The simplest question sets him off. 
• For example:

Me: “Gee Mr. Pigeon what did you think of that class?”

Mr. Pigeon: “BLAAARGH BEAAARGLE LAAAA!!!!”

Me: “Golly Mr. Pigeon I just asked how the class was, you have to calm down.”

Mr. Pigeon: “I know there. I just get angry there, and I just found out one of my pigeons died there and I don’t know what to do there, I guess that class just touched a nerve there you know?”

Me (Slowly exiting the room): “Huh what? Uhhhh yeah pigeons that sucks…See you at the next class” (Running full speed to a safe haven)

"Optional Recreation"

Lent itself to some amusing moments.  Spaz, Alex Trebek, The Curmudgeon, and I all played Pitch.  Spaz was all over the place and couldn’t stop eating sugar.  Senor Poopy Pants laid one and then left mysteriously before we could properly pin the blame on him.

Group Projects

We all go down to the basement to participate in a group project.  This is already getting pretty annoying because I feel like I’m at Camp Bournedale again.  However, it is also funny because these 30 somethings transformed into immature children, but I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt because the project was immature in itself. 

 

We had to make up an endangered species and come up with a reason for saving it.  Ours was a bird that saved sick children by spraying its venom through its ass on people.  We put rocket boosters, tattoos, and goggles on it to make it look cool.  I thought for sure we were going to be the worst presentation, but come to find out I was sorely mistaken. 

 

The girl group came up with a turtle with a tree growing out of its shell.  When asked what purpose this animal could possibly serve to humanity they came up with some cockamamie explanation, “When it rains the tree cleanses the water and it goes into the river and cleanses that water so all the world has pollution free water.”  I wanted to ask why the hell they needed the turtle if the tree does all the work, but I thought better of it because I realized we had rocket boosters on our bird for no reason.

Goodie 2 Shoes asks entirely too many questions.  “Why hasn’t the U.S. just outlawed alcohol?  I think it would take care of a lot of the problems associated with alcohol in the world.”  (Hmmmm I’d love to slap her off the head with a history book turned to the Prohibition section, but she is raising her hand again with this gem) “Why don’t they make a pill that gives people a natural high?” (I’m thinking it’s because it wouldn’t be a natural high anymore if you had to take a pill to achieve it…just a shot in the dark though). 

At this point I am flabbergasted because I was always told that there is no such thing as a stupid question, but this lady has managed to completely disprove that theory in a matter of 30 seconds with 2 ugly questions in a row.  Bravo…clap…clap…clap.